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原则上不喝酒,基本上不抽烟,一般情况下不怕老婆,但坚决不锻炼身体。最恨背叛和赌博,最爱善良和忠诚。最想建一个个人网页,最怕建网页的编程。最信奉生活的理想就是为了理想的生活。

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学会经营自己的幸福  

2012-02-05 11:20:11|  分类: 随笔感想 |  标签: |举报 |字号 订阅

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本文转载自晨世飞客《学会经营自己的幸福》
学会经营自己的幸福 - 晨世飞客 - 晨世飞客的博客

 Ke Yunlu once said: the world has a lot of good things, eat eat a very fragrant. Eight eat dinner, and must have not eaten enough, the next still want to eat. However, if it must have something good, insisted on eating one to eat very much bread into 11 sub-saturation, or even stays in uncomfortable, people eat wounded, even tired. The same feelings can not be required to produce tired of each other.
Now the family, many men and women friends are looking for a happy life with his so-called, complaining that their own immediate well-being can not be given, always thinking of an unrealistic dream, and even some are looking for a happy life, in fact, well-being by your side.
I remember the Nobel Literature Prize winner George Bernard Shaw said: "At this very moment on Earth, about 20000 individuals fit to be your life partner, depends on which one you first met, if the ideal companion in the second before the appearance of front of a person you have developed a great friend Xiang Xi, the deep mutual trust relationship, then the latter will become your good friend, but if you front a people do not cultivate deeper relationships, feelings it is easy to waver, change of heart, until you partner with these ideals, one of the candidates have a strong affection, is the happy beginning of the end of wandering. "
Love do not need to rely on the efforts of a person, just to rely on "encounters" is God's arrangement, but "continue to love a person" would depend on "efforts" in the business of love, the smooth functioning of the elements of that communication, understanding, , inclusion and self-made (to face the temptation to be self-made). There are many people always the "fortune" by the confusion and distress, ideas non-stop desire constantly chasing dispersed, while forgetting the ability to cultivate their emotional well-being is the key.
So do not go to ask in the end who is my mr.right, but to ask that in front of partner relationship, to what extent I can work and grow to what extent, if there is no ability to cultivate a business well-being, even if true mr.right appear in your side, happiness will still be missed, but live in the hesitation and regret them, is not that many "love nothing disease" encounter with the mind do?
If you now have a companion accompany long-term, do not hesitate to casually half-hearted manner, and we are not always easy to detect emotions in a trap, is the "next of kin of Health slow humiliated" that is, the iron law of economics, "law of diminishing marginal benefit "The longer with you people, the easier it numb and ignored, while the fresh," fortune "always so lovely and moving.
In the emotional approach, it is inevitable there is friction and unintentional injury, but on the offending add up the number of its own greatest number of people, of course, is with us the longest and most intimate people. The new love it, but also had yet to have offended you the opportunity, coupled with his deliberate to please, so to see how a new love how cute, how old love to see how annoying.
But do not forget, new love, who is always uncertain unknowns, old love who is a rare sense of familiarity to determine the sense of trust. Do not casually in the accident, "fortune" in the lost himself misplaced a happy warm hands.
So, George Bernard Shaw, then, is to remind the lovers do not get too into a dead end in only to find that, should the spirit of being used in the ability to learn to operate, but also to remind us to "take Yipiao 3000 drowning drink" if lucky enough to find a rare partner, would not have half-hearted, because we never know when life will encounter some 20000 of them, so Tomoyoshi xifu, live in the present.
Fate is to say - though there are many people throughout the world, but in rain to accompany you home late at night, in fact only one.
Well-being of people who are good people forget that they had given anything, but always remember what someone else had their own ... ...
Search for happiness is not as good intentions of operating happiness, cherish everything we have now, some things lost can never find a non-return. In fact, happiness is within your grasp!

柯云路曾说过:天下有许多好东西,少吃一口就吃得很香。吃饭八分饱,绝得没吃够,下次还想吃。但如果绝得这东西好,硬要多吃一口,吃成十分饱十一分饱,甚至撑的难受,人就吃伤了,甚至厌恶了。感情也一样,不能要求让对方产生厌倦了。
现在的家庭,很多的男女朋友都在寻找着自己所谓幸福生活,抱怨自己身边的不能给予幸福,始终想着一个不切实际的梦想,甚至有的终身都在寻找幸福,其实幸福就在身边。
  记得诺贝尔文学奖得主萧伯纳说:“此时此刻在地球上,约有两万个人适合当你的人生伴侣,就看你先遇到哪一个,如果在第二个理想伴侣出现之前,你已经跟前一个人发展出相知相惜、互相信赖的深层关系,那后者就会变成你的好朋友,但是若你跟前一个人没有培养出深层关系,感情就容易动摇、变心,直到你与这些理想伴侣候选人的其中一位拥有稳固的深情,才是幸福的开始,漂泊的结束。”
  爱上一个人不需要靠努力,只需要靠“际遇”,是上天的安排,但是“持续地爱一个人”就要靠“努力”,在爱情的经营中,顺畅运转的要素就是沟通、体谅、包容与自制(面临诱惑有所自制)。有许多人总是为“际遇”所迷惑与苦恼,意念不停、欲念不断、争逐不散,而忘了培养经营感情的能力才是幸福的关键。
  所以不要去追问到底谁才是我的mr.right,而是要问说在眼前的伴侣关系中,我能努力到什么程度、成长到什么程度,若没有培养出经营幸福的能力,就算真的mr.right出现在你身边,幸福依然会错过的,而活在犹疑与遗憾当中,这不就是许多“爱情虚无症”的遭遇与心态吗?
  若你此刻已有一位长久相伴的伴侣,不要再随便三心二意地犹疑了,我们往往不易察觉感情中的一个陷阱,就是“近亲生慢侮”,也就是经济学中的铁律“边际效益递减法则”,跟你在一起越久的人,就越容易麻木与忽视,而新鲜的“际遇”总是那么动人可爱。
  在感情对待中,难免有摩擦与无心的伤害,而且论得罪自己的次数累加起来最多的人,当然是跟我们在一起最久、最亲近的人。而新欢呢,又还没开始有得罪你的机会,再加上他的刻意讨好,所以新欢怎么看怎么可爱,旧爱怎么看怎么讨厌。
  但别忘了,新欢身上总是有不确定的未知数,旧爱身上就是有难得的熟悉感、确定感、信赖感。千万不要随便在偶然的“际遇”中迷失了自己,错放了幸福温暖的手。
  所以萧伯纳的话,是要提醒情人不要太钻牛角尖于寻觅那唯一,应该把精神用在学会经营幸福的能力上,同时也提醒我们“溺水三千只取一瓢饮”若有幸遇到了难得的伴侣,就不要再三心二意了,因为我们永远不知道一生何时会遇到两万个其中的几个,所以要知福惜福、活在当下。
  缘分就是说——世界上的人虽多,但在下雨的深夜陪你回家的,实际上只有一个。
  幸福的人善于忘记自己给过别人什么,却永远记得别人给过自己什么……
  寻找幸福还不如好好用心经营幸福,好好珍惜现在所拥有的一切,有些东西失去了是永远也寻找不回来的了。其实幸福就在你身边!

学会经营自己的幸福 - 俊哥(pwj-cy) - 俊哥的家

 

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